An SOS message to Scientists and Inventors!

Do not be alarmed! A political revolution is sweeping the face of continents, shattering governments in Tunisia, Egypt, Cote de voire, Libya. There is no cause for alarm. The Earthquake-Tsunami-Nuclear explosion perplexed Japan and brought the techno-giant to its knees. Why should you be alarmed? Budget cuts in Britain forces the citizenry to re-think and regret voting for the current political dispensation. Alarm bells are chiming now as atheists now re-consider their thinking and cultivate it towards the lines of...

WHAT?

Yes, the world is in turmoil and we have every reason to be alarmed. Nothing above is new to the populace around the world. But what we really should fear apart from the million and more souls lost to the wars and natural disasters, are the post-traumatizing effects of it all. RADIATION! Radiation from Japan is inching closer to the U.S. and the rest of the world. Cancer and DNA abnormalities will now be the order of the centuries to come. Food and the water beds would be contaminated. What is the hope of our unborn generation?

It is noteworthy to mention that with every new technological invention being constructed, measures should be put in place as to how to curtail such invention should in case a tragedy occurs. I am sure Einstein would be rolling in his grave by now, as to the mess (which was supposed to be a weapon before being used for energy) he had invented which is now leading to the slow extermination of humanity. 

To make matters worse, scientists wake up announcing that curry is bad for you. Tomorrow, they'll say it contains anti-oxidants. Then the list became chocolates, red wine, sex, and so on that was once bad but now is great for the health. Plastics were wonderful for heating foods in the microwave...now it's fatal.

I think i am beginning to envy the folk in the villages/counties/rural areas where they live simple, stress-free and non-polluted lives. And guess what...they get to live to grand old ages of 100 years and above.

Let's face it, all you aspiring writers out there. How can anyone dying in a country think about reading a book? If the world is collapsing, trust me, nobody will remember getting a book. Instead, they would think of saving themselves first and their families and then look for means to survive.

Early morning gory sight

I was on my way to work which is supposed to be about 30 minutes away. But combined with traffic, it goes for about an hour. In order to beat this unyielding menace, i board the commercial bikes, popularly known as Okada. As usual, there was a traffic build-up and the Okada driver tried manoeuvring through the busy road, until Lo and behold!, i witnessed a trailer parked awkwardly by the road and an okada lying sideways on the ground with a middle-aged man writhing on the ground with his intestines popping out of his body onto the ground.

There was so much blood and the man was conscious. But i can imagine the shock and the excruciating pain he must have gone through. The scene was enough to bring tears to my eyes. Cars drove by without stopping. And who would blame them? In Nigeria, a good samaritan could be transformed to a criminal for lending support. If a person helped and the man died in his/her hands, the person could be charged for murder as there is no proof to validate whether the deceased knew the good samaritan personally.

To make matters even more complicating, the doctors in General Hospitals are currently on Labour strike. As for private hospitals, the fees are enough to discourage the man's peers from assisting him as they belong to the low class.

Even the Okada driver that took me to my bus stop had to pause for sober reflection and i equally cautioned him to be very careful and not be over zealous in his driving.  As most of Okada drivers lose their lives like this every day and every week due to reckless driving. Some will say in Vernacular english that "Nothing fit happen. I dey drive Okada for 20 years" or worse, if you are cautioning them to slow their speed "Wetin now? Shey i no dey see road" (meaning that you should leave him alone as his eyes are clear). As we tried to decipher what could have caused such a fatal wound, my Okada driver said (in his illiteracy) that the trailer must have stepped on him. Ofcourse, this is completely untrue as the victim would have been pressed flat on the ground with his bones and organs squished.

Sad to say that with the traffic, an ambulance would take longer to come to his aid and even if one was available, the doctors' labour strike would have made it impossible for such service to occur.

Please, be careful whenever you drive or board a commute. A word is enough for the wise.

Hope for the Hopeless

What a sad and fearfully hopeless period for the Japanese People!!! In a twinkle of an eye, all was lost as families were estranged as a result of the earthquake which led to the Tsunami that eventually led to the Nuclear reactors overheating, causing a catastrophic combo to annihilate the populace. The news channels always serve the same gory headlines, screaming at the madness of it all; coupled with an arab revolution. It's as if the world is about to come to an end.

Everyone knows the advancement the Japanese people have reached in terms of civilisation, technology and all other things scientific. I cannot but imagine that their corresponding needs must increase with this thirst for over-achievement. But, i cannot belive that a natural disaster-prone area would build Nuclear bases. Electricity is an important need and necessity but i wondered why they couldn't have invented safer ways of obtaining electricity because in this life, nothing is perfect...nor lasts forever. This has even forced western countries who have nuclear bases to review their bases. Already, a majority (if not all) Japanese people are infected with Radiation and these people who have a history of the Hiroshima attack have to be replenished with a new dose of DNA attack that is insurmountable for millenia to come. Just imagine these people marrying other races thus spreading the cancerous and deformity genes (thus never ending the cancer scourge), trying to stay alive with the radiation poisoned water and food, and seeking shelter as well as a comeback to their activities pre-catastrophe.

I saw an elderly couple on television looking for their only adult son through the rubble of the pub where he had worked and my heart leapt out for them. Where do they want to start from? When they are supposed to be reaping the fruiyts of their labour, they are now reaping the dividends of grief and trauma.

As they say, when there is life, there is hope. PLEASE donate to the Japanese Relief, Red Cross and pray for these people because they sure need overdoses of it. And thank God continously for where you are and what you have today because it could be you tomorrow.

Hugs from me to you

It's been a long while and i promise that i will concentrate on my blog, full time. I have really and genuinely missed you all. ***dabs a tear***. And here is a hug from me to you.

So, Quick questions, How has this year been to you? Have you lived up to your New Year resolutions?If you're a writer, are you editing or wait...SUBMITTING?? As for me, i was neck deep in situations i just couldn't control but hopefully, i am wading to the surface of the tempestuous water. Also, i was disappointed with the Harlequin turn-out, i must confess. Now, i know better than to submit partials to editors of contests. How come known authors don't do that? It only goes to show that these so-called publishing giants want to steal ideas of wanna-be authors, flesh the story and publish, while getting the kudos. Remind me, never to submit my stories to any contest of that magnitude because they always steal. I really do not have much to say but i want to say that my blogging will be in full swing next week, i assure you.

So, stay glued here for all the things that make you smile. Hugs from me to you.

Happy Valentine's day!!! Pre-val.

Yep, it's too early to be saying this as its Valentine's day tomorrow but HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! It's on the dreaded monday but it can still be fun. And not necessarily spent in the arms of the one you love..erm???

Enjoy the day with all asundry. Even the gardener at your office needs an upliftment, even if it means a smile or a pat on the back (until they sue for sexual harassment...lol) or the waitress that serves you coffee or even Mr Grumpy the boss.

And, do reserve the chocolates and wine and other good stuff in the fridge if you want to keep your weight on the down low.

It's so funny when i remember my high school years when i would be secretly and desperately hoping for a secret admirer to suprise me with gifts. Hmmm...i would then cry privately if i didn't get any. So, in order to make things a bit steamy and interesting for you all, why don't you tell me about the experiences you had during Valentines' day in High school?

Say it loud and proud!!!

Hello everyone?

I do hate apologising but i will have to do it now. I apologise for not blogging simply because my boss stubbornly refused to pay for the company subscription and i was absorbed in my WIP and (fell ill in the middle) and tried to do some car shopping (probably SUVs) so there you have it.

I tried going through people's blogs to update myself and catch up with the blogosphere and it looks like everyone is busy doing something or the other. That's what the real world can do to you. I have gained a few pounds (arrggh, thanks chocolates, fast food and other junk!) and i had my first rejection...ever. From one of the biggest romance publishing houses...Harlequin from the So You Think You Can Write Contest. Anyway, i have learnt a lot from that and that's why i will say what i have to say...loud and proud.

1. When you get rejected, it's not the end of the world. Because someone doesn't like your work, doesn't mean someone else won't.
2. Learn from the experience and move on. I have read a lot of Harlequin books and seriously some storylines are a bit annoying and cliche-driven and flawed but those manuscripts still got published. My story was unique (like what any body would say) as i do not live in a fantasy world. Yep, love is sweet and nice and it still hurts/sucks and why shouldn't you inculcate that in your work? We do not live in a century where knights come in shining armours, instead they get on your nerves and yet still fall in love with them.
3. Be surrounded with positive energy. I instantly researched agents who are more likely to approve my work and i have been thoroughly encouraged by the experience.

       (SAW THESE REALLY COOL WALLPAPERS FOR RESTROOMS ON THE NET)

4.          This would be the last time i enter into another contest with millions of people all over the globe. 
             Why? My boyfriend told me that most of these publishing houses are suffering from in-house   
            writers' block so they are looking for fresh new ideas to steal from. Obviously if you've never been   
            published before, you would do anything and everything in your power to impress them so they steal 
            ideas and still reject you.

5.        My middle may be a bit heavy, same with my cheeks and butt but i still get to show off my curvy
           body off. YEAH, CUZ I AM SAYING IT LOUD AND PROUD!

I truly missed all of you so i would now be blogging during weekends or whenever i can get my own internet subscription which is very much going to be possible this week.

Thank God it's Friday!!!

Squee...Yay...LOL

The day was slow but thank God it's friday because i am going to PARTY!!! (joking) but at least i'll get to do what i luuuurrrrvvv to do which is writing. Lest, i forget, Twitter has an amazing cyber ocean of agents. Wow, i even met one in a space of seconds but i definitely couldn't pitch anything to her (you do not want to make a bad impression, being the new year and all). I'll also get to watch new films during the weekend. I watched Black Swan, Dear Mr Gacy, Dead Zone Series (a few episodes), Tron Legacy and The Tudors (a few episodes) during the holidays. Natalie Portman acted very nicely in Black Swan, which is a pyschological thriller (great for shaping up your writers' imagination, if you know what i mean). The movie for once had a different twist, in the sense that you'll expect Natalie's character to get down and dirty with her teacher but it wasn't so. Let me not spoil the gist for you all, so run along to the cinema near you.

Time to shake something...have a lovely weekend, everyone. Do not overindulge, don't drink and drive, don't fight with your spouses and above all, do spend some time with your spouse (after the writing time, that is). Bye.

N.B: I love both movie posters and i couldn't deal with the dilemma of having to choose one, hence the two.

No Kiss Blogfest

Unfortunately, i forgot to post my No Kiss post on January 2 as i was enjoying my break from using the P.C. But for more information on this nice contest, here's a really cool blog to visit here. A big thank you to Frankie Diane Mallis, the owner of the blog who also extended the contest. You can also check out her cool pages.


Sooooo, here's my story on a grace to grass footballer who is reunited with his high school sweetheart (who is now a successful painter by profession) after he had jilted her for fame and fortune.......enjoy.

THE REUNION

       She shook her head. She got out the heated pizza slices and almost flung it on the table, in annoyance. How could he have thought I didn’t take it seriously? Night after night, I cried as I thought it was true that I was a bad painter until I made a vow to work on my painting and prove him wrong, she thought. Seeing her changed disposition, he reached for her hand and caressed it, while he spoke.

“I’m not saying this because this is the right thing to say. I admit, I was a pig, a jerk and whatever vile name you can think of. From the bottom of my heart, I’m sorry I said those mean words. You can’t compare the mind of a 19 year old with a 31 year old. And as for what you said concerning my marriage, it was built on lies. I can’t explain the details now. My naivety and stupidity got the best of me. Even my team mates can attest to the temptations they face. But, that is not an excuse and I am ready to face whatever punishment you feel will help you move on. Mercedes, I am very sorry and believe it or not, I never stopped thinking of you.”

For lack of a picture to fit the depiction, this will have to do

             Her cheeks became flustered. Dale had tears in his eyes as he spoke. A clear indication of his honesty. Her heart suddenly leapt out to him. The stroking movements of his hand made her shudder. She averted her eyes.

“Mercedes, please take this from a man who has seen life. I shouldn’t even have anything to do with women after what I’ve been through” And with that, he left her hand and walked to the window. A garden and a fence occupied his view but he wasn’t looking as his mind had wandered. Looking at his bare back, she was tempted to run her fingers on them. Her hand still sizzled from his hot touch.

“Dale” she said, thinking of how to tell him, she had already forgiven him.

He turned around, folding his arms, his demeanor changing.

“You have forgiven me. There’s no need to pretend. I can see it in your eyes. Besides, why would you have bailed me, in the first place? Don’t forget I know you. Standing there, dripping wet from a shower and wearing nothing but a sheer gown...”

          She eyed him, feeling the embarrassment take over. Her strong girl persona had been rubbished. How could she forget that he knew her, even more than she knew herself? Was she coming on too strongly? Wasn’t she supposed to make him, her love slave? Before she could sort out her feelings, he had stormed over to her and grabbed her by the waist, looking into her eyes, his mouth, inches away from hers, their breaths meshing together. The way, he grabbed her, sent a warm electric current flow, through her body. His now raging erection had pressed into her. She imagined the sweet taste of his mouth on hers. Unconsciously, she placed a hand on his cheek.

“No need to be embarrassed. I want you twice as much. God, I am at my control’s edge of taking you right here on the table”

Her heart seemed to flutter with joy. She wasn’t frigid after all.

Kiss me, dammit, she thought. He closed his eyes, tightening his hand on her waist, fighting the urge to cup her beautiful, round buttocks. Her scent enthralled his nostrils, causing his erection to thicken, more than before. He used a finger to rub her seductive pout, remembering the games they played, as teens. The temptation to make love to her was deliciously irresistible. She taunted every bit of his senses.

“I don’t want to take advantage of you. We just met again after all these years” he continued. She begged him with her eyes. She was now flowing with wet abandon. The anticipation was becoming unbearable. She had kissed him before and as a teen, so why was it now hard? Her hands now held his well carved biceps for support. Please, Dale, Kiss me, she thought. No, No, don’t let go. He was releasing her from his grip, while shaking his head, rapidly. What if she’s using me?, he thought, getting away from her. 

Postscript: This is a Romance WIP of mine. So, it's still rough. But, do please comment on what should be added or subtracted. Thanks.

Resolutions Countdown

Happy New Year 2011 to you all!!! I can't wait for bloggydom to get rolling with blogs again as everyone resumes their activities. My resolutions for this year are but not limited to the following:

1. Jogging every weekends: Tick. I have started this already and my muscles were so pulled tight, i thought i was going to collapse from pain. Also, i have a pear shape i desperately need to get into shape (thank you mom for those genes) even though i am not close to being plump. I jogged during the weekend and i gasped so much for breath. I now have a new found respect for athletes and showbiz people.

2. Family ties: Tick. Spend more time with my family. I'm an independent girl on a business mission so i did enjoy my holiday reunion with my family. More of that, definitely.

3. Writing/Editing/Submitting: My YA Mainstream WIP is over 50,000 words and my target is 80,000. After NaNoWriMo, i neglected it so i need to pick it up again. My romance fiction is a work in progress after my first chapter submission to Harlequin. My writing had suffered badly due to work, home stress and my Masters Degree Thesis. So, this year i need to pick it up again, finish my 2 WIPs (the romance WIP has surpassed the YA Mainstream unfortunately) and edit, revise and then start submitting. Hopefully, i'll finish my Thesis in late February and pick up my beloved writing.

4. Get Married: Well...well...well...i do want to get married but it seems that each time i get financially closer to my goal (my fiance too), one pressing commitment rises its ugly head. I do not even want to listen to my alter ego telling me if both of us are even serious to begin with. But deep down, i do want to get married, though i am not 100% desperate about this. My biological clock isn't helping matters also. Tick tock, tick tock...countdown begins.

5. Higher work pay: I definitely am working on this as its about time i start buying those things on display in shops (clothes, shoes, accessories, you name it) and travel (hmmm....bahamas calling) to exotic areas. You only live once, right? So, why should i be stuck in a routine job while saddled with more responsibilities than i can think of and still get underpaid? (Seriously affecting resolution 4 above). And how can i achieve this...Psst.

6. Save: Definitely not easy when your salary is average (nope, i'm not telling what i earn) but i am working towards achieving resolution 5 which would translate to a better and higher savings plan for myself and my unborn kids.

7. Have fun: Tick. You only live once so i am getting out of my conservative self and exploring the night scene once in a while because i am such a homebody (my alter loves to explore) so i am definitely taking up this one.

8. Add Masters Degree to Resume: Yep, i'll finally do this and i am happy about this. In my country, qualifications do matter and that translates to achieving Resolutions 4, 5 and 6.

For now, i can only think of these. What are your new year resolutions? Have a wonderful day. Peace.

End of 2010

Hello my bloggy peeps. How are you enjoying your holidays? (for the few that have actually been online) I couldn't resist sending one last blog post for the Year 2010!!! Can you believe that this is the last day of 2010? Hmm...the year does bring a lot of nostalgic memories to mind. Good or bad, the year is over and unfortunately will not repeat itself, ever. Unfortunately, a lot of people lost their lives this year, either through natural or man-made causes. For those that lost a loved one this year, let's have a moment of "non-typing" silence...





And we're back. Let's do make 2011 a super duper year of the fulfillment of plans and the realization of dreams. No one knows what the future holds but whatever happens, let's leave worthwhile legacies behind. If it means, putting a gun to an editor's head to get your manuscript published (...i hope you know i am joking!), to getting that plum job or bagging a hubby/wife or adopting a pet or giving a little back to the community...let it be something you will feel good about and others can say positive things about you.

Here's toasting to a wonderful, positively challenging and interesting YEAR 2011 (raises glass of white sparkling wine). Happy Holidays!!!

Hilarious Random Pictures for the Holidays! Celebrity Edition

Happy holidays to you all. In the spirit of the holidays, i present my humble bloggy self to you all. I was browsing as usual when i saw some celebrity pictures on the net (let's face it, i am a snoopy armadillo when it comes to celebrity gossip). Now, these sets of pictures made me smile...and laugh. I tried to depict what they might be thinking below. Some are cheeeeeeeeeeesssyyyyy but...it's all for fun.


You might have seen them but in any case, just enjoy.

Man might think: "Let's just get away from the noise and the party and have our private party"

 Just imagine Dustin Hoffman's thought: Dustin: "Hmm...Hmmm, that is one big handful balloon. Brad is lucky"

David might think: "This is one butt i can grab and do naughty things...not like skinny boned Vic"

Scarlett Johansson: "Grandpa Woody, what do you think you're doing?"
Woody bends: "Ooh. How i want to rub my nose in those babies."

Sophia Loren: "Who does the slut think she is? Trying to upstage me with her...her...fake...hmm, they look nice"

 Diddy: "Whoa, Jessica sure has the meanest, illest, phattest set of boobs in this industry"
Jessica Biel(through clenched teeth): "Careful, Diddy. Justin T. isn't far, you know. Gotta look good for the paps"

Man thinks: "I would absolutely love to have a twosome with these fine niceties...not like the wife with her sagginess"

 Guy in red chequered shirt (laughs with others) thinks: "Double damn! I wish she was single and i could be her hero"

 Scarlett: "I just love that premiere, like, totally.(thinking: Yeah, go on. Have a long look. I'm not the sexiest woman alive for nothing"
Girl: "Yeah, it rocked...(thinking: I really need to get an implant. Gosh!)

Halle Berry: "Let's take a picture fand discuss our next movie project..."
Bruce Willis thinks: "How would Halle's boob taste like? Maybe like Demi's or...OMG, the paparazzi is snapping this! I will make them DIE HARD!"

Merry Christmas in arrears and a Happy New Year in advance!!!

Decided to blog today and wish y'all bloggy folks a merry christmas and a happy new year, though i noticed that most bloggy folks have taken a break from blogging. And who would blame them? So, how was your christmas?

I spent mine eating and watching movies. I got gifts though. But this christmas in this country is just a bit above average, probably because of the economic recession where people are kind of tight-fisted or tight-pocketed. Hmmm.

So, how will your new year be? In Britain, they call the new year holiday as bank holiday. In Nigeria, we just say new year holiday.

A word of advice:

• Do not over indulge
• Do not drive while drunk
• Do not forget to fasten your seat belt, even in party mode
• Do not forget to stock up your fridge (after the celebrations, you will need to survive or even feed your cat or dog or some exotic animal)
• Do not forget to visit your old folks (at least show you care)
• And above all, do not forget to BLOG about your holiday : )

Happy holidays peeps!!!

Hilarious Random Pictures for the Holidays!

I had no idea what to blog about until i saw a funny picture..no, make it two and decided to share with y'all. Today is the official break day from work till 29th. So as far as blogging goes, lets keep the fingers crossed. Who knows? I am guessing (no, deciding) i'll use this time to meet and greet my long lost (forsaken) friends, eat holiday food, dance, and work on my W.I.Ps.

A big thank you to my followers, the lovely blog from Kittie Howard, the lovely comments from Kittie, Joanna and L'Aussie and all the love. Hope you guys and girls have a wonderful christmas holiday and do not forget to make and stick to your new year resolutions. I do hope by next year, i would edit and revise my WIPs for Jan-April, Get it critiqued for May, Revise again for June, Submit and Query for July. Wait till October for responses from agents. And in between, work on another manuscript.

The first is real and the picture was taken in Nigeria some time ago. It was quite popular and went viral. The second picture (cartoon) marks the fantasy of the artist, in which case, chickens begin to protest by defending themselves from humans' ravenous apetites (a story could come out from this...LOL).

Cheers to a wonderful merry christmas and a happy new year in advance.

Interview with Doctor Funny

 Scroll below for this interesting and hilarious interview with a doctor with a difference, forwarded to me by a friend. I don't know the doctor's name but read on. It's guaranteed to make your day!!!

 

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
 

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...  don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer?  Take a nap!!!!!   
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables? 
 

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat?Hay and corn.   

And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of

delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products. 
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?  
 

A: No, not at all.  Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine; that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up! 
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
 

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program? 
 

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain ... Good!

Q: Aren't  fried foods bad for you?   

A:  YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ..... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?  
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle? 
 

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?  
 

A: Are you crazy?

HELLO ... Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!! It's the best feel-good food around! 
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
 

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?  
 

A:Hey! 'Round' is a shape!  

 

 

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about foods and diets.

And remember:
'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather ..........  to skid in sideways ---

- Chardonnay in one hand

- chocolate in the other 

- body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO......HOO,

What a Ride'!!!!

 AND .....

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health.

It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like.
Speaking English is apparently what kills you!!!!!
Learn to speak another language


I don't know about you but the mail had me laughing my arse off. Disclaimer: Please, follow your own doctor's advice as this blog will not be held liable for any misconstrued statements. Thank you. Peace.

The balance of showing and telling

One of the prerequisites of a writer is to show and not tell a story. Showing is the way or style in which writers, write a story that enables the readers, experience the story's entity which is a mix of the characters' actions, emotions rather than narrating the story's exposition, summarization and description.

This especially applies to all genres of fiction.

For instance, you want to write about Nellie stopping by a park to take some flowers home. What do you write? Do you write: And Nellie stops by National Park and reaches for some dandelions and trudges home. OR Nellie strolled through the cobbled steps of the National Park, the air blowing the long tresses of her chestnut coloured hair. She stops to pick a few dandelions in her view. Taking a quick sniff, she inhales the sweet, natural scent of the flowers. It makes her smile. With this feel-good charm, she skips on home.

Showing helps readers connect to the story's characters, thus making them sympathetic to these characters, which in turn makes the story believable. I wonder if the Spartacus series had been culled from a book, it would have made for an interesting read with its descriptive accounts.

The downside (bummer!) of showing is that your readers will get exhausted with the incessant and unnecessary aspects of describing every single inherent detail. They will lose interest. The book would also be too bulky with the extra word counts of these descriptions. Everything shouldn't be acted out as some scenes should be skipped. E.g. a xter is sleeping on the bed. Do you say, the xter is comfy in the king-sized 50 feet by 50 feet bed, in a side ways position on the journey to snooze-ville. BORING! Personally, i would smack the author with the book.

Telling is very useful as a shortcut to get to the juicy part(s) of the story. It also covers a greater span of time more concisely.

The objective is to merge and balance showing and telling or show,tell to get the right rhythm, pace and tone.

Frankie Diane Mallis is having a No Kiss Blogfest on the 2nd of January. Here's the link.

My Harlequin Alpha Male Inspiration

Harlequin December 15 submission deadline has passed. For those who missed it, sorry. Better luck next year or time. You needed to witness the expression on my face as i attached my synopsis and first chapter and clicked on the Send button. The anticipation of waiting for their response is just too great. More like Sleeping Beauty, sleeping in a trance and waiting for Mr Right to come to the rescue. January 31st which is the response day is...sooo far.

On my previous blog, i mentioned about the characteristics of the Alpha male and the realistic portrayals to imbibe when writing about this 'ideal' hero in comparison with the 'actual'.

Before i plot/pants (i am a combination of both), i imagine how my hero should look like because you don't want to write about a romantic hero that reminds you of Mister Potbelly at the Supermart. Or even use a name that is hard to pronounce like Mr Traffellapagus or Snaffellapagus (i think i heard it on tv). The person or image that came to mind was *********Ian Somerhalder of Lost and The Vampire Diaries Series.

 My hero looks like this deliciously irresistible male specimen. Now, which person can say they don't love his smouldering hot eyes****faints**. I think i've found a new crush. But hold on a second, my hero ain't perfect.





In a nutshell

• The Alpha male is strong and independent.

• He seeks to conquer the heroine (a must in romance novels) directly or indirectly.
• His ego usually gets in the way
• Alluring to the heroine
• Stereotyped in the Tall-Dark-Handsome category. Honestly, i write in  the 'ruggedly handsome' category like Ian's picture by the right. But, i am subjective about the tall and dark part. Sometimes, variety could just be that differentiating factor that sets you apart as a writer/storyteller.
• The Alpha male is allowed to have tears in his eyes. Do you see this as a weakness? In my own humble opinion, i see it as the author endearing the hero to the readers because it is a key strategy to persuading readers to become sympathetic to the MCs especially the Hero.
• He doesn't always have to give in to his sexual cravings (in the case of romances). He shouldn't always be seen as this man with the compassionate or egotistical and animalistic drive to quell his raging hunger for (Censored). Sexual tension is a plus these days as it engages the readers to keep turning the pages and desperately wishing something happens. Think Twilight and Dawson's Creek. Or better still, those Mexican Telenovellas with their endless twists and turns of the hero and heroine coming together, getting all sexually tensed up (with viewers adjusting their seats for the ultimate scene) and then getting interrupted or even fighting again.
• He's supposed to have flaws. It could be his temper, his ability not to say no to everything, smoking or drinking too much, farting, you name it.

    
The list is inexhaustive but you get the big idea.

I want me some alpha male

Looking at the formulaic patterns of romance books, one can't help but get drawn to the alpha male in the book. He is the epitome of maleness. Huge ego, courage, bad temperamnet, ability to conduct greeeeaaat sex acts, master in the art of seduction and temptation...and let's not forget, the huge biceps, amidst the blue/brown eyes, kissable lips and a host of other things, that get women 'creaming' their panties, fantasising on how such men would give them head...

Am i too vulgar? Nah, if you read Erotic fiction or you write erotic fiction, that is nothing. He is mesmerised by the fragile, lithe, sometimes bony/skinny female and has a raging, almost animalistic drive to have sex with her. Gosh, i read some of these romance books and i, burst out laughing. The authors or publishing house(s), ''brainwash'' their target readers into believing, the alpha male is just within your grasp, if you believe...Now, i'm not dissing romance books as i was a huge fan as a teen, but you and i know that men don't come across as all lovey dovey or whatever. I like some books who have inculcated that realistic pattern of male cons into the writing process, in order to embody the sweet and sour realism of it all. And, that makes for a truly great read, and one in which cynical readers like myself can truly appreciate and be sympathetic with the main characters.

Now, i believe every woman has a fantasy of how her ideal man should be, so it's understandable. Now, i would have preferred a realistic couple like this (inclusive of any imperfections cuz no one is perfect) below

              as opposed to say, a couple like this below:  (Nice garters, and butt, by the way)

 Or another couple like this below:

as opposed to this above:








Without further rambling, i present a few alpha male pictures from the millions that you love...or rather, LUST!!! Naughty, Naughty you. Yes, you.






Hmmmmmm, OMG, David Beckham!!!

I could get lost in Ian Somerhalder's eyes.***blushes*** LOL

Kinda like his Vin Diesel's bad boy image and his character in Pitch Black.

Haa!

My Entry for Erica's Blogfeast

Ladies and gentlemen, i present to you my entry for Erica's Blogfeast. Honestly, i do not know what to think of it. I 'm just following the rules and trying to keep up with the deadline in conjunction with a gazillion other things i must do. Soooooo.......

The story is set in the U.S. No specific town is used except for Maple Boulevard which i don't know if it exists or not. But i am sure i've heard the name somewhere. I don't want to delve deeply into the plot and what not, as i don't want to spoil the story for you. Please, be kind. I had to write the entry between weekend and today. Ofcourse, be honest. That's the only way for a budding writer like me, to grow, right?

And for those that are not aware of this blogfeast, i suggest or rather insist you check it out here.
It's a blogfest with interesting prizes. And, i admire the cute turkey badge. I wonder where Erica got that from. I have forwarded my food which in my previous blog, i mentioned that it is Jollof rice and Spicy fried chicken.
Without further ado, here is my entry:

 TITLE:         BETRAYAL BY MAIL

      With one flicker of the dust pad, the dust particles left the wooden framed portrait, Melanie Buchanan held in her lithe hands. The picture held a very special memory for her. Floods of nostalgic memories enveloped her mind, making her smile in the process. Her husband of almost two years had been drafted to Iraq, leaving her to literally raise their daughter, Amelia. Gosh! I’ve missed you so much. I can’t wait to hold you, my love. So much has happened since you left...

“Mummy, you promised to teach me how to weave Darlene’s hair” interrupted Amelia, her frizzy hair, shielding her face as she clutched a doll.

“Give me a second, baby”

     The little girl trudged off from the bedroom. Melanie arranged the portrait, along with others in her carry-on suitcase for her trip to her in-laws for thanksgiving inclusive of eleven other military personnel under assignment. When Melanie had heard the news, she had been elated at the prospect of re-uniting with Craig. The electronic media had been awash with the news of the military personnel’s arrival.

     During the meeting she had had with the other army wives at the barracks, a cake was prepared amidst sparkling champagne to celebrate with her...or so it seemed. Majority of them couldn’t contain their jealousy for the simple reason that her husband was the only one among them that was being sent back to the country, except for Sophia, whose husband had arrived a few weeks earlier.

     Suitcase packed, she joined Amelia in the simply furnished living room. Grabbing the doll from her hands, she slowly began to weave the synthetic hair into braids.

“You put one here and loop the second one through here plus the third. See. Then you keep doing it over and over again.” she said, showing her how to achieve a weave. “Okay. I told you that we’re going to see grandma and grandpa today because its what?”

“Thanksgiving” answered Amelia

“Good. So we’re leaving and you can continue Darlene’s hair in the car.”

“Okay, mummy”

     On the way to the Buchanan’s residence at Maple Boulevard SW, Melanie’s thoughts wandered, behind the steering wheel. For the umpteenth time, she checked the rear-view mirror to see if her makeup was in its proper place. Though, she hadn’t heard from Craig directly, the information she had received at the barracks was that Craig would be arriving at his parents’ home for thanksgiving. She hadn’t given it much thought why Craig didn’t communicate with her directly. She believed it did not matter as long as he was coming home.

*

     The Buchanans which comprised of a middle-aged couple, gave her and her daughter, a warm reception. Half an hour later, Mr Buchanan was helping to push Amelia’s swing in the playground as the two women got down to business in the kitchen.

“I’ve already done most of the cooking before you came” said Mrs Buchanan, bending over to examine the turkey in the oven. She rubbed some seasoned oil on it and closed the oven door.

     Melanie scooped some mashed potatoes into a casserole from a mixing bowl, grinning from ear to ear. Her mother-in-law observed her.

“Don’t worry, dear. He’ll be here soon. I can see how excited you are.” the elder woman said, assuring her.

“I do love surprises but I can’t understand why he hasn’t called me. But hey, if he did, then it wouldn’t be a surprise anymore, would it?”

“Let’s wait for Craig, okay. Please help me with the wine from the cellar”

     The cellar was replete with aged alcohol from whisky to red wine. Remembering Craig’s favourite, she picked two bottles of 1950 Vintage whisky and glanced at the remaining forty or so left. She quickly added another under her arm, afterall, she and her husband deserved a private celebration in their room, when the ceremony was over.   

     Within minutes, the bottle was safely tucked under her mattress before joining her mother-in-law at the dining table. Mr Buchanan was inside, washing his and Amelia’s hands, in preparation for the meal. Melanie looked at the clock chiming on the wall. 4 o’ clock. Her senses began to go on red alert.

“He’s not here. Where is he? I truly hope he’s okay” she panicked, reminiscing on the video chats they previously shared on how he complained of the nights of bedlam, he experienced daily. “What if something happened to him?”

     The couple exchanged glances.

“Why don’t I show Amelia our spider collection?” joked Mr Buchanan, dragging his grand-daughter along with him.

“Spiders! Eww” she replied, scrounging her face.

     Melanie paced around, wringing her hands and momentarily biting her fingernails, ruining her newly manicured nails, in the process.

“Calm down, Melanie. He’ll be home soon” said Mrs Buchanan, helping herself to some whisky. She looked the picture of calm.

“Are you sure he’s really coming home? I mean, he...he should have called me.”

“You saw it for yourself on the news. Your husband’s picture and eleven men, totalling twelve in number. Besides he got in touch with me and he specifically said he’ll be here for thanksgiving”

“I’m so worried. It’s been about 5 years and I just...” she said, anxiety weighing her down as she broke into a sweat. Her armpits were glued in a sticky entangle with her cotton blouse.

“Here, have some. It’ll help calm you down”

Her mother-in-law poured some whisky in a glass and handed it to her.

     Half an hour later, she was having a nervous breakdown until a car pulled up in the drive-way. Melanie jumped up to peer through the window. Two uniformed soldiers got down from an SUV and pulled out a wheelchair from the boot. The wheelchair was assembled before the car door flung open. A man, whose view was obscure, was assisted into it. Melanie covered her mouth as she backed away from the window. Mrs Buchanan kept silent, feeling sorry for her. The door opened, revealing Craig in the wheelchair, a sombre expression etched onto his face.

     Melanie shook her head, the tears dripping down her cheeks and smudging her mascara, she had painstakingly applied.

“No” she screamed, running upstairs into a room and slamming the door behind her. She buried her face into the pillow, wailing, unaware that her mother-in-law had entered the room.

“Melanie”

“Go away” she sobbed. “That is not Craig. I want Craig back”

“Oh, don’t be childish. Is that the reason why you ran away? You said it yourself that it’s been years since you’ve seen him and now he’s here.” She sat beside her on the bed and placed a hand on her back, caressing her. “He was ashamed to tell you of the injury he sustained in Iraq. You should be thankful, he wasn’t killed. Now, wipe those tears and come, embrace your husband”

     After an extra coaxing, Melanie sat upright and dabbed her face with powder on the bedside table. Downstairs, Craig was chatting with his father, while Amelia sat on his laps. Craig looked up to see her, the sadness revealing itself in his brown eyes. He hadn’t shaved for a few days, though his hair had been cut low. Everyone watched her, waiting to see her next move as she stood frozen, looking at him and avoiding staring at his legs.

     Craig handed Amelia to Mr Buchanan and wheeled himself close to her.

“Baby” he began

“Shhh” interrupted Melanie, crouching to hug him. The flood gates of tears bristled through both of them, their emotions at a fever pitch. Craig caressed her hair as he held her.

“I’m sorry I failed you. I couldn’t...” he said,

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I was the one that ran away when you came instead of supporting you. I’m so sorry. It was very stupid of me. Please, forgive me. I didn’t know how to react”

     The Buchanans exchanged glances once more, each with a tear in their eyes. Amelia looked on. They decided to give them some privacy, aware of something dire to come in the future.

Craig held his wife’s face, clutching a few strands of blonde hair as he gazed deep into her blue eyes. Their hearts were competing in a beating frenzy.

“I’ve missed you so much. I can’t believe I’m seeing you in the flesh and not through a video. I have so much to tell you.” he breathed

     She was about to speak when he planted a long kiss on her mouth. Her lips felt so soft, so succulent under his as he kissed them, teasing her mouth to open further. Gosh, its been so long since we’ve experienced this. He captured her tongue, conquering it. A moan escaped from her, as she thought of how so, so long she had been with her husband and the wonderful sensations that within her body. He was far from rusty as he made her shudder. A feeling of warmth flowed through her, emancipating her in the process. Someone cleared their throat, disengaging them slightly.

“The food is getting cold” declared Mr Buchanan, smiling mischievously. The two lovebirds reminded him of when he and Mrs Buchanan were very naughty, back in the day. “And Amelia is starving”

     They smiled in response. Melanie wanted to push the wheelchair for him but he wheeled himself, instead. Mr and Mrs Buchanan again exchanged glances, communicating non-verbally to the other. Yesterday, they had had a heated argument about their son and daughter-in-law. If their daughter-in-law knew the real reason why her husband came home, it was going to be the end of their marriage. Sitting at the table, Mr Buchanan said grace.

Brought to you courtesy of:

Which of these fits your relationship spec?

As i was reading through celebrity gossipville, i stumbled upon a couple who has just cancelled their engagement. Lo and behold! It was Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood. The on and off again couple look kinda weird yet they proclaim to understand and love each other. Now, i want to refrain from getting deep and personal on issues like what is wrong with celebrities and their relationship? Why can't they just be freakin role models and make their marriages work? and other bla bla sturvs.

I decided to bring you different calibres of couples from recent to medieval. The transformation as you can see is significant. My question, however, is, which of the couples do you think fits your ideal specification?

COUPLE ONE:
Evan Rachel Wood looks like a definite mis-match for Marilyn Manson but who am i to judge, right?

COUPLE TWO
Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry looked dazzling together.

COUPLE THREE
Famous Tudor King Henry VIII of England and second wife, Anne Boleyn.
                                                                                                                                                                                                            

 

COUPLE FOUR

Cleopatra and Marc Anthony were formidable in their own time.

COUPLE FIVE

The famous globe-trotters, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt.

These relationships have a resounding BUT to show their imperfections; so in response to my question, which relationship do you think fits your relationship specification?